Rules Are Rules

"Only one bag", the Resigned-Looking Lady at check-in said.

"But I thought it was hand-luggage plus laptop or handbag".

"Only one bag" RLL repeated. I puffed out my cheeks and blew slowly through my pursed lips, trying to give the International Gesture for "Well, I don't really know what to do then".

"Look, you can just shove your laptop in there", RLL waves two fingers dismissively in the direction of my battered hand-luggage "and put it back when you're through".

"Well that's a stupid rule, isn't it?"

"Yup, but rules are rules".

As I approach the security gate Cheeky Young Man calls out.

"Hey! You can't carry that!" nodding at the big bundle of jumpers and thermal underwear that have been displaced by my laptop and that I've shoved under my arm. "One bag only".

"I'm not leaving these!" I protest, "It's reeeaaallly cold where I'm going."

CYM casts glances over each of his shoulders in turn then leans in conspiratorially.

"Alright, mate, come through here and I'll help you out" pointing an open hand at a side area - where several other people are standing confused amid unpacked piles - in the International Gesture for "This way please".

I follow him over saying

"Look, I'll just end up wearing all this through there and taking it off again".

"What have you got in there?" CYM asks of my stack of winter clothes.

"It's just clothes. Jumpers and thermal underwear. Do you really want to see me put my underpants on out here?"

"Over your clothes?" asks CYM incredulous. "You're not Superman you know."

"Well, I'm not taking my clothes off here if that's what you're getting at." I say, then mutter sarcastically "At least not if you don't buy me dinner first".

CYM's eyes widen and he looks around at his colleagues - a portly middle-aged man, a ropy-looking middle-aged woman, and a horse-faced girl in her late 20's. "There's no pretty girls here to say that too, so leave it out" and laughs. "Alright, just tie the jumper round your waist and you can carry the rest through. Once you're on the other side, you can repack your stuff into two bags".

"Pointless rule?" I suggest.

"Well, rules are rules."