Bothersome Beverages

I have a really immature and irrational vendetta going against my Culture teacher. It's not that he's a bad person, just a terrible teacher. Rather than admit that he doesn't know something, he'll ignore the question and go off on a tangent, or just make something up.

Case in point? During the chapter on alcohol, he claimed that Shanghai beer was among the best in China - even better than Harbin Beer.

"What's Shanghai beer?" I asked. "Is it a brand?"

Teacher Xu obfuscated a while before changing the subject.

Not one to let things go that lightly, I brought it up in the next lesson. Teacher Xu grinned as if I'd fallen into his trap, exposing a row of uneven yellowing teeth.

"There are three Shanghai beers. 百威 ("literally 100-power"), 雪花 ("snow drop") and 三得利".

百威 is Budweiser - an American beer produced by Anheuser-Busch. 雪花 is from Shenyang province, and is far from popular in Shanghai. As for 三得利, its name is a phonic transliteration of Suntory, the Japanese company famous for its beer and whisky, as featured in "Lost in Translation".

I tell him as such, and he tells me flat-out I'm wrong.

The next lesson, I bring in a bottle of Budweiser and hand it to him.

"It's in English and Chinese, but there are three place names on there. Beijing ..."

Teacher Xu interrupts me.

"Ah yes, yes, Beijing, that's where it's from."

I sigh, shake my head and continue "... printed as part of a promotion for the 2008 Olympics; America, which is where Budweiser is from; and Wuhan, which is where this was produced".

"Well then, the other two are definitely Shanghai beers." My blood boils and I choke down a scream. My petty little quarrels hardly mark me out as a good student, but at least I get to practice my Chinese debating skills, and it's more interesting than listening to his damned lies. No option but to track down bottles of the other two beers.